Celebrity Big Brother Blog 2011, Day 10 - Holy Moly!
Previously on Big Brother, Darryn discussed his mythical friendship with Princess Diana, Tara taught everyone how to do the 'rapey dance' and Paddy laid the foundations for a successful career as a fashion critique. That was Day 9 though, we're into double figures now, and that's all that's important. So, without further ado, HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED ON DAY 10!
"Who is peeing in the shower? John is peeing in the shower!" the Edward part of Jedward sings to himself to get Day 10 off to a good start.
This is apt, because Day 10 in the Celebrity Big Brother house is all about Jedward. Jedward, Jedward, Jedward. We can't help but love Jedward.
First of all, Bobby teaches the pair of them how to shave, despite the fact they have nothing to shave. But still, they endeavour with their challenge, using a sock as a flannel along the way, and they are clearly delighted with the results: "Kerry said out face is as smooth as a baby's bottom. And she's touched a lot of babies' bums." See, their brains can think logically.
We are soon surprised, however, to hear the narrator Marcus announce that "Jedward are creating modern art". That is until we see what is meant by modern art, i.e. a tower of plastic chairs wobbling one on top of the other.
The twins are still bored though, and, with everyone else napping, ask Big Brother: "can you give us something cool to do, so we can like wake them up or something?". Big Brother replies: "you don't need Big Brother to give you a task", which is quite frankly the most misjudged response they could ever have given. On cue, they proceed to cause havoc around the house:
1. By filling a bread bag with water ("this is part of the task", they claim) and throwing it directly at Darryn, who walks over and hands it back like the big boring bastard he is.
2. By giving Paddy a wedgie, which provokes his amazing reaction: "w w w wedgie wedgie wedgie... bloody sausages!" More people should use 'sausage' as an insult.
3. By flooding the bathroom floor with soapy water and dragging each other across it by the legs.
Is it just us or are Jedward running the show at the moment?
Elsewhere, Amy is given a task by Big Brother to drop five different Shakespeare quotes - or 'S Bombs', as they called them - into conversation with her fellow housemates. The fact she picks Jedward first, knowing they'd be an easy target what with them oblivious to what's going on half the time anyway, and yetstill manages to fuck it up, is really quite revealing. "The Earth has music for those who listen. D'ya know what I mean? Like, we need music asap". QUICK! Somebody get the music!
Amy also tells Jedward and Sally about how she rarely buys outfits anymore, but instead borrows them from designers for one night only. "I felt a bit mingey at first", she explains, which is an odd feeling to experience in such a situation, if it is a feeling at all.
Of course, Sally is evicted, and Adele's 'Someone Like You' is played over the top of her post-eviction montage, which worryingly makes it seem like she has actually been evicted from life and died. Bobby's happy about staying though, he says: "I can't tell you how much it means to me. I feel like I'm ready now, this is day one." If only he knew there was only 1% in it. Who wants to be the one to break it to him?
Finally, as a 'post-eviction snack', Jedward enjoy a tin of tuna with a splodge of ketchup on top. It reminds us of this gem.
Quote of the day goes to Pamela, who tells her daughter on the phone: "It's been really fun, and Mommy's sleeping with 12 people."
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